I feel disposed to
write you a few lines this mor-
ning having a little leisure time
on my hands. It is now over
one month since I received a letter
from you and I am inclined to
think that one must have ben
lost as it is unusual for so long
a time to elapse between your
letters. My last was written on July
10th which I trust you have recieved
by this time. The weather has ben
remarkabely dry here this season
there having fell but very little rain
for the past three months and the
roads resemble ours in Utah so far
as dust is concerned, which is some-
thing unusual as you must know
for the green lanes of England
Page 2
and if this hot sultry weather
continues I shall feel like seeking
the more congenial temperature
of some ice house and remain
there till the leafless trees bending
before the chill November blast
shall bid me come forth. I have
received two letters from Mother
lately one written at Ashby and
the other since her return by which
I learn that she has enjoyed her
visite very much and returned in
health She writes of the country through
which they passed as far surpass-
ing in beauty anything she had
previously beheld and strongly urges
upon me the desirability of taking
a trip out there on my return which
I shall try and do; all things being
favorable; but I think one of the
first places that I shall make
for will be St George, that is if
you still remain there. Mother says
that Owen is Owen still and expects
Page 3
that he will be to the end of the
chapter I always thought that he would
take a greater interest in things about
the place as he advanced in years
but it seems that he is rather slow
manifesting any improvement in that
direction for the better. She says
the place stands sadly in need of a
Father or big brother to look after
it, and I sometimes think that I would
be doing more good at home than herepreaching to this hard hearted
hard headed and stiff necked generation
It just seems utterly impossible to get
anybody to accept of our message
as they appear perfectly satisfied with
their old worn out forms of christian-
ity, they seem to think that the whole Gospel of Jesus Christ is sumed up in
the one word believe. Just simply
believe on the Lord and you will be
saved they say, and you might talk
to them untill every hair in your head
Page 4
turned gray and you would not
convince them to the contrary, and
indeed the time has fully arrived that
was spoken of by Isiah when he said
that darkness should cover the earth
and gross darkness the minds of the
people; [Isaiah 60:2] they have heaped to themselves
teachers having itching ears who have
turned away their ears from the
truth and they have ben led astray
after fables. I am still holding a
good many open air meetings but
thus far to all humane appearances
with but little if any success. Still
I realize that it is my imperative
duty to warn the people and that
it will be woe unto me if I preach
not the gospel, if it were not so
I should not be so often seen and
heard in the streets proclaiming
that glad tidings of great joy; for
realy there is no joy no satisfaction
in preaching to sutch an indiferent
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class of people, unless it is in kno[wledge]
that we are doing the will of God, and
if we grow not weary ^(of well doing)^ and faint not
we shall reap our reward. Ours it is
to preach and proclaim the message to the
people, and theirs it is to accept or reject
it. I continue to prosecute my labors
with unceasing dilligence because I feel
it is my duty to do so, but I can-not
go at it with that view and avidity that
I should like to. I seem to have no
faith in being able to bring any one
to a knowledge of the truth what little
faith I once possessed has nearly ben
crushed out by repeated rebuffs, still
Mormonism is true, this is my testimony
but there is something wrong with me
for surely if the Lord was pleased
with my labors he would crown my
efforts with some success. I say it
deliberately, and not in a bo^a^stfull spirite
either, that there are but few elders if
any ^(in the Mission)^ who have done more preaching
Page 6
alone in the streets than I have
and many times I would sooner have
taken a good horse-whipping than
done it, but all this would be joyfully
endured if only the Spirite of the Lord
would dwell with me to comfort me
and support me in times of trial so
far as deriving spiritual benefit is
concerned my mission has ben a
partial failure at least, and I think
my whole life is a failure. I sacrifis-
ed the object of all my natural affect-
tions and the only girl that could
have made me happy in this life,
It was my own fault that she proved
false to me because of the coldness
of my letters. I acted as I did in that
matter thinking that the Lord might
be displeased with that alliance, and
hoping that by disolving it I might
get an increased portion of his spirite
but alas my hopes were vain and
now at times my life is truly
Page 7
miserable. I value my mission
for the experiance it has given
me of the world and I know that
the L.D.S. are the most moral chaste
benevolent and God fearing people in
existance and rejoice that I am
numbered among them; but now all
my hopes that I entertained when
leaving home are blasted. I have no
particular object in view no ambitian
to be any body or attain unto any
ends my soul seems lingering in
the dark valley of sorrow and dispair
at times it is a severe struggle to put
on a cheerfull countenance when
occasion requires it while there is
a deep sorrow burning within
Pardon me for writing in this manner
Dear Father, but it is best that you
should know. Thus far I have kept
my own council and the elders do not
know anything about it, only Bro Pens
ase knows that there is something wrong
with me. You can keep this to yourself
Page 8
as I may be able to overcome it
in time, and mean to have a
struggle for it anyhow. A conference
will be held in London next Sunday
the 2nd prox. at which Bro Wells and wife will be present also Elder Osmond
editor of the Star. The London branches
are going for an outing in Eping Forrest
on the 5th of August. All the elders are
invited. I have held eleven meetings
in the open air alone since writing
to you last and at one of them
there were between three and four
hundred people present. Several of
them have ben disturbed by ministers
but they have always got the worst
of it. One of them insisted that it was his
imperative duty to warn the people against
sutch abominable ^doctrines^ but he insisted more
strongly in getting out of the crowd bfore I
got through with him. He acted as if he wanted
to crawl through a not hole in the fence
neare by, he looked so excedingly small-
in the eyes of the people. Well I must say
good-by onece more and hope that
this may find you enjoying good health.
Your Unworthy son A H Woodruff